Dear Readers,
Are you one of those people who have a hard time loving yourself? If so, you are not alone. Loving yourself is an ongoing journey. It takes practice. You can do it! Here are some tips for you to practice self love.
1. Practice receiving love
To truly love is to be able to receive it. When someone loves you, does some kind deeds to you, say kind words, give you gifts, or give you compliments, embrace it. Allow yourself to feel the love that has come your way. Know that you are worthy of love. It is important to accept a gift of love by others. You give yourself a chance to learn more about yourself that you are lovable. You give someone a joy of giving by loving you. Another important way is to practice receiving love by saying “I love you” to yourself. Let that love fill your heart. Receive that love that you give to yourself unconditionally.
2. Practice saying “no”
It is o.k. to say “no” to people when you do not feel like doing something. Do not feel guilty about it. Just realize that you have the right to do so. This is different from doing things out of love. If you do things out of love and your heart wants to do them, that is a different story. What I am talking about here is when your heart does not want to do it and you feel like you have to please someone, and make others happy by over extending yourself. Learning how to say “no” is an art. It takes practice. You might say “Thank you for asking. I am not ready to commit to doing anything right now.” You cannot please everyone. When you say “no”, remember to smile sincerely and say “no” gracefully.
3. Do what you love
What do you love to do? If you could find something that you love to do and spend time doing it, you will experience love, joy, and happiness in your heart. That is when you truly connect with your authentic self. As a result you become happier and more loving.
4. Treat yourself like treating your very best friend
How do you treat your very best friend? Do you treat him/her with love, kindness, trust, appreciation, acceptance, and respect? If you can give that to your friend, why don’t you give that to yourself? Practice treating yourself like you treat your very best friend by saying kind words to yourself. Stop calling yourself names. Stop beating yourself up. Forgive yourself. Give yourself compliments. Know your boundaries and listen deeply to your needs. Treat yourself kindly, gently, and lovingly like you treat your very best friend.
5. Forgive
Forgive yourself for all the mistakes, regrets, shames, and everything. Leave the past behind and be present with your new day. Today is your day. It is time to move forward. Just do it.
6. Nurture yourself
Self care is very important. Set up some time to be by yourself, just by yourself. Do something that gives you peace, love, and joy with yourself. You can nurture yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.
Physical
*Go to a gym, yoga class, take a walk, play tennis, or any kind of exercise that you love to do
*Go to a dance class if you love to dance
*Take a nap when you want and need to
*Get a massage
*Consume healthy food that is good for your body.
Realize that you do this because you love you. Take very good care of you. If you don’t, who will?
Emotional
*Feel good about yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror, smile, and say “I love you. I am love, loving, and lovable.”
*Listen to your favorite music
*Acknowledge your accomplishment each day even it is a small thing
*Look at the sunrise each morning
*Pet your dog or cat
*Water your plants
*Call or e-mail your friends and share your feelings with them
*Wear your favorite clothes
*Do whatever makes you feel good about yourself
Mental
*Read your favorite books
*Write your daily journal about dreams
*Write your to do list
*Write your gratitude list
*Make a list of your short and long term goals
*Track your goals
*Make a list of things that you want to improve about your life, love, and relationships
Spiritual
*Meditate or contemplate
*Be centered with your higher self
*Connect with nature
7. Stop comparing yourself to others
Everyone on this earth is unique. We all have different gifts. When you compare yourself to others, it makes you feel bad about yourself. When you compare yourself to others for what they have, whether it is a car, a house, a mate, children, money, or a job, it makes you feel low self esteem, lose your confidence, and perhaps depressed, envy or jealous. A way to stop comparing yourself to others is by focusing on your own strength. Get to know yourself and discover what is your greatest gift that you are meant to share with the world.
Another great way is by practicing gratitude. Be happy for what you have. Really be grateful about everything that you have; people in your life, job, relationships, material, etc. Gratitude keeps your heart open to love. No one is quite like you. Just be you. Be grateful for being the wonderful you. Do the best you can. Be the best you can and love yourself more. Then, you have more love to give to others.
8. Stop trying to be perfect
Here is a quote from a dear friend of mine: “Excellence I can achieve. Perfection is God’s business”. Stop criticizing yourself for being less than perfect. Always do your best. But, not reaching perfection is not failure.
9. Change your self talk
“Change your Self-Talk and you will change your programs. Change your programs and you will change your life.”
~Dr. Shad Helmstetter
Have you ever watched your thoughts on how you talk to yourself? Is it negative or positive? If you have been talking to yourself negatively, you can change it by changing your programs. You can change your self-talk by changing your programs that have been stored in your brain since you were born. A great way that I would recommend is to listen to self-talk cds. It works for many people. It worked for me and it changed my life in an amazing, profound, and incredible way.
There are 3 books by Dr. Helmstetter that I highly recommend.
1. What To Say When You Talk to Your Self.
2. Who Are You Really And What Do You Want?
3. The Gift
To learn more about Self Talk, please visit www.selftalkstore.com.
If those books and cds can change my life and many people’s lives, it can change yours!
When you love yourself, you have more love to give. You become more attractive. As a result, you attract more love into your life when you are love, loving, and lovable.
With Love and Gratitude,
Pichaya
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Saturday, October 2, 2010
8 Tips to Attract Love Into Your Life
Dear Friends,
If you are yearning to love and to be loved, here are some tips for you to attract the love into your life.
1.Be a magnet of love
You attract love by being a magnet of love. Love is what you are. The people you attract are the reflection of who you are. If you are loving, cheerful, or positive, you will attract that kind of people into your life. If you are angry, negative, or doubtful, you are more likely to attract that into your life. How do you practice being a magnet of love? It is simply by filling your heart with love and thinking happy thoughts. Think of a time when you first fell in love. Feel it. Truly feel it. How wonderful and blissful does it make you feel? Then, act upon it. Act as if you are already in love with your ideal partner. What does he/she look like? What are the values/qualities in the other person that you want to see? Imagine he/she is here right beside you. Imagine how great it feels for you to be loved by that special someone. Imagine the touch, the kisses, and the love making. Feel the softness of his/her skin, hair, the warmth of his/ her body, and hear the voice. See you both together being deeply in love, hear the laughter, and feel that strong bond of love between the two of you. When you imagine, it becomes real. Allow yourself to be unlimited. That is what you are. You are unlimited. Why limit yourself? Imagine, think, act, feel, and act upon it. Then, you will manifest it. When your heart is filled with love, you become a magnet of it.
2.Know who you are and what you want
It is very important to know who you are and to be specific with what you really want in your ideal life partner.
Here are some questions for you:
*What is your mission, vision, and life purpose?
*What are your values?
*What do you really want in a relationship?
*What is the most important for you in a relationship?
*What does your future partner look like?
*What qualities/values of your partner are you searching for?
*What are your relationship requirements, needs, and wants? To give you some ideas, please see mine:
Requirements
1. Must love me and my children unconditionally. (I was a widow with two small children at the time.)
2. Must accept the differences between us especially on my spiritual path.
3. Must be honest, loving, kind, giving, thoughtful, and understanding.
If one of those qualities is missing, the relationship would not work for me. I would not waste my time with that person. I would put my love and energy on searching for my white knight who would have those three qualities.
Wants
1.Compliment
2.Excitement
3.A middle age man 50+ with mustache and beard is a plus!
Needs
1.Love for me and my children.
2.Trust
3.Complete acceptance
4.Open Communication
5.Romance
6.Support
3.Believe in yourself and believe in love
What you believe, you achieve. If you believe that you would attract the right partner, you will succeed. If you believe that there was no right person for you, then, you would attract the wrong person. It is very important to recognize your highest potential and be aware of how you talk to yourself. Is it positive or negative? Any time when your negative voice appears, acknowledge it and ask yourself if it is true. Then, change that thought to be a positive and loving thought. Belief in yourself is a crucial step for your success in any area of your life.
4.Give love freely
One of the secrets of getting love is by giving it. True giving is when you give without expectation. When you give love freely, all that you give out comes back to you. It might not come back in the way you expect it, but you would truly feel it in your heart. If you can picture when you throw a boomerang, you will see how it comes back to you. What you give out comes back to you. When that love comes back to you, your heart will be filled with it. Then, you become a magnet of love and attract more love into your life.
5.Keep your heart open
It is hard to open your heart again after getting hurt. I know. I invite you to put things into perspective. Please see my questions to ask yourself below.
*How can you attract love into your life if you close the door?
*What could be the worst things that would happen to you if you allow yourself to be open?
*What possibilities or opportunities would you miss if you close your heart?
*What door would open if you keep your heart open?
*What are you afraid of?
*What impact does it have on you when you feel afraid?
*What opportunities are you missing when feel that way?
*What attitude do you need to shift?
*What would you do if you knew that there was someone out there in this universe who will love you truly and accept you for who you are?
*How would you feel if you fall in love again?
*How would you act differently?
*What would be possible when you give yourself a chance?
*How do you know if it is true that you would never find the right person? (This question is for those who believe in this thought.)
Please see my previous article about 10 Ways to Open Your Heart to Love.
6.Be grateful
Being grateful keeps you happy, healthy, and keeps your heart open to more love. The more you count your blessings, the more love will come to you. What are you grateful for? Make a list. Look at your list. Feel the love and all the blessings that have been given to you. Say “thank you” and really mean it from your grateful heart. You will feel the power of gratitude!
7.Be present
This is very important! Being in the present means you are here at this moment where you are manifesting love. Stop thinking about someone who broke your heart yesterday, last week, last year, or last decades. It is over. All of the broken hearts were over. The time is now for you to start your new life, new relationship, and new love. Let go of all the past. Be here now. Forgive those who hurt you. Send them love. Forgive yourself for everything. Today is your new day. It is your day to attract love. It is your day to be in love with yourself. Give yourself that love. Love, trust, accept, and forgive yourself. Give that unconditional love to yourself. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be loved. You deserve your new love – it is on its way. It starts from you. Love yourself and be here now.
8.Dare to dream big
Dreams do indeed come true. When you dream, it gives you hope, courage, and inspiration. Anything is possible when you believe in yourself and allow yourself to be unlimited. Your dream have to be big enough that when you think about it, it gives you goosebumps. If you dream of finding your ideal partner, see yourself with that person, feel the love that you are receiving, and know that you deserve this special someone to truly love you. Be in the relationship that you have always dreamed of. Dare to dream big and start living it. You will see a miracle.
Attracting love into your life starts from you. You have the power to create the world you want. You have the power to attract the love you desire. You can do it! You are a magnet of love.
Love,
Pichaya
If you are yearning to love and to be loved, here are some tips for you to attract the love into your life.
1.Be a magnet of love
You attract love by being a magnet of love. Love is what you are. The people you attract are the reflection of who you are. If you are loving, cheerful, or positive, you will attract that kind of people into your life. If you are angry, negative, or doubtful, you are more likely to attract that into your life. How do you practice being a magnet of love? It is simply by filling your heart with love and thinking happy thoughts. Think of a time when you first fell in love. Feel it. Truly feel it. How wonderful and blissful does it make you feel? Then, act upon it. Act as if you are already in love with your ideal partner. What does he/she look like? What are the values/qualities in the other person that you want to see? Imagine he/she is here right beside you. Imagine how great it feels for you to be loved by that special someone. Imagine the touch, the kisses, and the love making. Feel the softness of his/her skin, hair, the warmth of his/ her body, and hear the voice. See you both together being deeply in love, hear the laughter, and feel that strong bond of love between the two of you. When you imagine, it becomes real. Allow yourself to be unlimited. That is what you are. You are unlimited. Why limit yourself? Imagine, think, act, feel, and act upon it. Then, you will manifest it. When your heart is filled with love, you become a magnet of it.
2.Know who you are and what you want
It is very important to know who you are and to be specific with what you really want in your ideal life partner.
Here are some questions for you:
*What is your mission, vision, and life purpose?
*What are your values?
*What do you really want in a relationship?
*What is the most important for you in a relationship?
*What does your future partner look like?
*What qualities/values of your partner are you searching for?
*What are your relationship requirements, needs, and wants? To give you some ideas, please see mine:
Requirements
1. Must love me and my children unconditionally. (I was a widow with two small children at the time.)
2. Must accept the differences between us especially on my spiritual path.
3. Must be honest, loving, kind, giving, thoughtful, and understanding.
If one of those qualities is missing, the relationship would not work for me. I would not waste my time with that person. I would put my love and energy on searching for my white knight who would have those three qualities.
Wants
1.Compliment
2.Excitement
3.A middle age man 50+ with mustache and beard is a plus!
Needs
1.Love for me and my children.
2.Trust
3.Complete acceptance
4.Open Communication
5.Romance
6.Support
3.Believe in yourself and believe in love
What you believe, you achieve. If you believe that you would attract the right partner, you will succeed. If you believe that there was no right person for you, then, you would attract the wrong person. It is very important to recognize your highest potential and be aware of how you talk to yourself. Is it positive or negative? Any time when your negative voice appears, acknowledge it and ask yourself if it is true. Then, change that thought to be a positive and loving thought. Belief in yourself is a crucial step for your success in any area of your life.
4.Give love freely
One of the secrets of getting love is by giving it. True giving is when you give without expectation. When you give love freely, all that you give out comes back to you. It might not come back in the way you expect it, but you would truly feel it in your heart. If you can picture when you throw a boomerang, you will see how it comes back to you. What you give out comes back to you. When that love comes back to you, your heart will be filled with it. Then, you become a magnet of love and attract more love into your life.
5.Keep your heart open
It is hard to open your heart again after getting hurt. I know. I invite you to put things into perspective. Please see my questions to ask yourself below.
*How can you attract love into your life if you close the door?
*What could be the worst things that would happen to you if you allow yourself to be open?
*What possibilities or opportunities would you miss if you close your heart?
*What door would open if you keep your heart open?
*What are you afraid of?
*What impact does it have on you when you feel afraid?
*What opportunities are you missing when feel that way?
*What attitude do you need to shift?
*What would you do if you knew that there was someone out there in this universe who will love you truly and accept you for who you are?
*How would you feel if you fall in love again?
*How would you act differently?
*What would be possible when you give yourself a chance?
*How do you know if it is true that you would never find the right person? (This question is for those who believe in this thought.)
Please see my previous article about 10 Ways to Open Your Heart to Love.
6.Be grateful
Being grateful keeps you happy, healthy, and keeps your heart open to more love. The more you count your blessings, the more love will come to you. What are you grateful for? Make a list. Look at your list. Feel the love and all the blessings that have been given to you. Say “thank you” and really mean it from your grateful heart. You will feel the power of gratitude!
7.Be present
This is very important! Being in the present means you are here at this moment where you are manifesting love. Stop thinking about someone who broke your heart yesterday, last week, last year, or last decades. It is over. All of the broken hearts were over. The time is now for you to start your new life, new relationship, and new love. Let go of all the past. Be here now. Forgive those who hurt you. Send them love. Forgive yourself for everything. Today is your new day. It is your day to attract love. It is your day to be in love with yourself. Give yourself that love. Love, trust, accept, and forgive yourself. Give that unconditional love to yourself. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be loved. You deserve your new love – it is on its way. It starts from you. Love yourself and be here now.
8.Dare to dream big
Dreams do indeed come true. When you dream, it gives you hope, courage, and inspiration. Anything is possible when you believe in yourself and allow yourself to be unlimited. Your dream have to be big enough that when you think about it, it gives you goosebumps. If you dream of finding your ideal partner, see yourself with that person, feel the love that you are receiving, and know that you deserve this special someone to truly love you. Be in the relationship that you have always dreamed of. Dare to dream big and start living it. You will see a miracle.
Attracting love into your life starts from you. You have the power to create the world you want. You have the power to attract the love you desire. You can do it! You are a magnet of love.
Love,
Pichaya
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